I am not made for the love

Hello friends,
It has been a long time since I posted anything on my blog and this is the time when I gravely feel like writing something. Before I proceed, I must tell you that my upcoming post is going to be about my Enemy 'Charles Darwin', I will be writing about the methodologies to falsify Darwin and concept of Evolution. It would be posted on Saturday 31st March 2012.  I hope you it will be informative and you would like it.

Looking at the title of the post, you might be curious. So, lets first end the curious bit in you. :)
I am not at all made for love. Because nobody loves me! that's how simple it is. The one who is made for love knows what the love is, he knows how to talk with love, He must know various thing about it. And I? I can't even talk comfortably. When I talk, I need to plan in advance. I ask my best friend on how should I start and where should I end.
I can't crack silly jokes, I can't laugh on nonsense, but I do.. because my friend told me to.
I don't have a good sense of humor, but I am developing it, because I want to have it, even though, just for the show!

What should I do?

Love and its goal

When I talk of love I don't mean something that you might have seen in movies. The real love is a bit different, or at least in my case. I don't hesitate to accept the fact that a strange new feeling that is non-expressible, which we often call love, has been to me one time earlier. Consider my case, there is a girl I liked, I had a big secret LIKE for her since long, but i did pay no attention toward anything else. For example, even being a classmate i didn't talk to her, i would say nothing, and so she would. And I kept liking her. Day by day, this strange new feeling increased. Whenever i would think about her the heart beat raced. Why did not i say anything? The problem is, i have a deep 'respect-like thing' for her and next, my heart starts throbbing in front of her. It may sound a little weird but it is true that one may have such feeling for the one he/she loves.
Finally one day, i thought about telling this to her and then came up a question atop my senses: what is the final goal of this LOVE? This left me puzzled, do I want physical relations? No, currently, not at all. Do I want anything else? There is nothing to wish. so what do I want? What is the goal of love? The ultimate goal of love is sacrifice or to give away, the goal of love is the willing to share all of what you can, since no one, nor any thing last forever. And in fact, there is no need to create the goal of love, the goal is love itself. If you have an attraction towards someone’s beauty, not the whole existence, character, behaviour and all other things, then it is not love. This is what I believe. Most of the times, we notice 'love' only with an opposite gender person of our age but love has no such restrictions, it may happen with your mother, father, teacher or a professor. Here I would like to quote one answer to this: "The Ultimate ‘goal’ is to love without limits, boundaries, conditions, or expectations. Expectations can lead to disappointment which can in turn lead to hate. Now whether this goal is realistic or not is another question."